Don't Expect Anything!

There is a story in Tibet about a thief who was a great fool. He stole a large sack of barley one day and was very pleased with himself. He hung it up over his bed, suspended it from the ceiling, because he thought it would be safest there from the rats and other animals. But one rat was very cunning and found a way to get to it. Meanwhile the thief was thinking, "Now, I'll sell this barley to somebody, perhaps my next-door neighbor, and get some silver coins for it. Then I could buy something else and then sell that at a profit. If I go on like this I'll soon be very rich, then I can get married and have a proper home. After that I could have a son. Yes, I shall have a son! Now what name shall I give him?" At that moment the moon had just risen and he saw the moonlight shining in through the window onto his bed. So he thought, "Ah, I shall call him Dawa" (which is the Tibetan name for the moon). And at that moment the rat had finished eating right through the rope from which the bag was hanging, and the bag dropped on the thief and killed him.

Chogyam Trungpa, Meditation in Action

What's Next

The two words that I'm hearing most in my head today are "what's next?"

What's next for me? You? The world?

What's next for our country? Yesterdays Presidential Debate didn't give me any more clarity on who'd make our best next Commander In Chief. Parts of me wishes I could vote for two or three of the candidates.

What's next for my career, goals and art. Continuing growth in every area of my life will help sort out what's next for some of these things.. But nervousness about what's next sometimes leads me to jump at shadows and stress. These feelings fade faster when I use these emotions for positive change and direction.

I want to understand my fellow humans better. This is a goal that's important to me for every relationship I have no matter how insignificant or important.

Treating others well feels great and good guys always finish first, right?

What's next for JT and I? We're slowing getting to know each other and things have been good. Is this relationship solid and healthy? Can it survive? Are we doing the right things?

My 34th birthday is fast approaching and I'm sure that's why I woke up so thoughtful and reflective today...But there are things I've got to do and work that has to be done.

Answers to my questions will be apparent soon enough and I'll keep doing what I can to ensure my wanted outcomes.

The best is yet to come!!!

Buddhist Thought For the Week

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time. - T.S. Eliot

ShakeTown 2 QuakeVille -n- back to FogCity!!

Wow...I felt the earthquake last night at 4:42 a.m. I'm not sure how strong it was in my hood but according to the U.S. Geological Survey, it was centered 2 miles east of Oakland and it could be felt on both sides of the San Francisco Bay. The 4.1 quake woke me up and honestly it felt a lot stronger than it really was.

Makes ya feel alive!!

Anyway..here are some pictures I've recently taken.

Enjoy!

Two Jobs Plus

This morning at 11 am I'll be interviewing with a staffing firm here in downtown Fog City.

Hopefully I'll land an office position that will utilize my various computer and office skills.
I'm not sure the amount of hours I'll work every week but I've a lot of free time for the next couple months which means I could potentially be working forty hours plus soon.

I also found out yesterday that I'll be working for a friend who owns and operates one of Fog City's premier medical cannabis boutiques.

For now I've two jobs and hopefully soon that will be two plus jobs! I'm tired of being tired over not making much money so it's awesome that hopefully I'll be past this point soon.

Now it's time to take care of Job One because I enjoy keeping a roof over my head! ;-p

Peace All!!

Just another Day

Today and the last few days have been chill. Lately I've been working on music, going to the movies, preparing for interviews later this week, taking photo's, hanging with friends and spending lots of time JT and Oliver.

Soon I have to start my building manager duties and after that I'm not sure what the day will bring.

So it's just another peaceful day here in the Tender-Nobb. I hope your day is peaceful as well.

He said " I love You" Today!!!!

He said he Loves Me!

His name is JT and I have to say he's amazing.

I've been seeing him for almost a week now and I'm pretty sure he won't be going anywhere soon. Well, I think I've been seeing him and his dog, Oliver.

It was only supposed to be about fucking and hanging out but it has turned into so much, much more!

My head is swimming and I'm not sure what to make it of it all.

But I did tell him "I love you too!"

4get about Me

Forget About Me by Pablo Neruda

Let us look for secret things
somewhere in the world,
on the blue shore of silence
or where the storm has passed,
rampaging like a train.
There the faint signs are left,
coins of time and water,
debris, celestial ash
and the irreplaceable rapture
of sharing in the labour
of solitude and the sand.
--Translated by Alastair Reid

Buddhist Thought for the Week

The belief in an external world independent of the perceiving subject is the basis of all natural science. Since, however, sense perception only gives information of this external world or of "physical reality" indirectly, we can only grasp the latter by speculative means. It follows from this that our notions of physical reality can never be final. We must always be ready to change these notions - that is to say, the axiomatic basis of physics - in order to do justice to perceived facts in the most perfect way logically. -Einstein

A few Thoughts Today

Do you ever wonder if there is any hope at all? Ever think the forces of the universe are messing with you big time, trying to bring you down.

Forcing you to bring forth your greatness?

But as we know, greatness isn't measured by what we achieve. Greatness is measured by what we overcome. And to overcome, we need other people in our lives that can pick us up when we are down.

The only way others can help us is when we start with truthfulness, all the time - no matter how much it hurts. All these mind games we play only hold us back. They hold us back in our romantic relationships, they hold us back in our friendships, they hold us back in life in general.

How many people in your life are you truthful with?

How many people do you tell exactly what's on our mind?

How many people tell you what's on their mind?

Unfortunately one thing that stops us from having truthful relationships is summed up in an old deodorant commercial from the 80's:

"Never let them see you sweat."

We are so embarrassed, ashamed, guarded about our fears and doubts. We hold back from being honest with our parents because we don't want to let them down. We hold back from being ourselves with our boy or girlfriend because we fear they will reject us if they knew our darkest thoughts and fears. We hold back from leaning on a friend because we think they can't hold the weight.

But, if we want to succeed in life, we must have at least one or two people with whom we can be open with, with whom we can share whatever it is that we are. This path called life is not meant to be walked alone. It's meant to be shared.

This week, open up. Let it out. Have the courage to be weak. Talk to the people who love you and let them help you. The truth is, if they are really there for you, they will love you even more.

They will love you because you are true.

They will love you because you are real.

Happy Monday

I'm thankful I made it to another day!! After a great nights rest, I've woken up full of energy and life.

My weekend was fun, relaxing and interesting. I was on the other side of the Bay last evening hanging out with a cool new friend. Thanks again Luis!

I got to see a great movie that returned me to my childhood. There were visits from friends and the eating's of yummy Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream.

Wimbledon/tennis was on my television so that means I was watching Rafael Nadal. I mean what's the point of watching tennis unless Rafael is playing? He didn't win his match yesterday but boy was it a good contest!! Also, it was great to see Venus Williams win on the women's side.

So over all a Happy Monday to start my week!!

Today I've a meeting at 10am. I'm hoping that after this meeting I'll have a clearer idea on how I'm going to fund this next year of school.

Wish Me Luck!!!

Transform

Got to see the Transformers yesterday with a buddy.

I feel like a kid today! All I want to do is play with Autobots and Decepticons.

LOL.

If you haven't seen this movie then I think you should take the time to check it out. It's a little dumbed down as far as the script is concerned and definitely longer than it needs to be but over all worth the price of admission. If only just to get the chance to see talking, 15 feet tall, living robots!

It will make you feel like a kid again too!!!!

Passed Away

A friend of a friend died a few weeks ago and today is the memorial. I didn't know "Matty", as his friends called him and in fact I'd only had met with once. That day wasn't all that long ago to be completely honest. But today I'm planning on attending a memorial service for him with his family and close friends.

A few weeks ago a close friend of Matthew's and I had been out and about running errands. On the way back to my apartment my friend (loosely used here BUT that's a whole other story) stopped to talk to someone entering the front door of an apartment building.

Introductions were made and after a bit of conversation and connecting the dots of our mutual friends me and my "buddy" returned home to my pad.

On that day that Matthew and I met what struck me were two things.

One was his wit and the other thing was his eyes. Even though I'd never met him before Matt knew who I was. With wit and charm he helped connect the dots and even made this stranger feel welcome. Matthew Beals was a young, talented, kind guy who was taken way to soon. And even though he wasn't truly my friend I can see and tell by the same friends we shared that we would have made very good friends.

So for those that have truly lost him, I stand with you in your loss today.

And I feel your pain that your friend has passed away.

Matthew Beals MEMORIAL:

metadatadisco.com/matty.htm

Buddhist Thought For The Week

Our theories of the eternal are as valuable as are those of a chick which has not broken its way through its shell might form of the outside world. - Buddha

231 years old.

Happy Birthday America!!

You look damn good for 231!!!

Today I'm having a busy day of hanging with friends, the movies, an evening of meeting new people at a barb-b.q. and fire works on Treasure Island with Mikey this evening.

Have fun kids!

Im Famous(not)

During Gay Pride last week someone took a photo of me and I one of my friends saw it on this site and sent me a link.

Check it out for a laugh. Just cut and paste the link and you'll see me and my bug glasses!!

http://nitevibe.com

Happy Monday Everybody!!!!

Buddhist thought of the week

I'll be posting weekly a Buddhist thought for mine and everyones thoughts. I hope it helps someone out there! That means me as well!!


Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

Summer Movie

The summer time is a great time to be a movie lover! There are so many new releases and choices that it just boggles the mind.

In years past, the hype surrounding certain films has been unbearable. Think the last three Star Wars for instance or last years second Pirates of the Caribbean.

This summer has been a lot different!

So far this spring/summer I've seen 28 Weeks Later, Evan Almighty, Spider Man 3, Shriek 3, Fantastic 4 and tonight my new favorite: Ratatouille!!

What a great, funny and beautifully made film!!! I totally suggest seeing it!! That is if you enjoy laughing your ass off and viewing something absolutely brilliant.

Pixar has done it again and this new film shows them only getting better!

Motel Damon

This morning my apartment feels like a motel. That may be because I've decided to help two friends who need a place to lay they're hats for the next couple days.

Well, to be completely honest it's really only one that needs a place the other has a place but needs a friend to be close at hand while he detoxes.

OK, OK..The real truth is that they both have places but one needs a friend while the other needs my couch..Ouch: that sounds weird.

Alright, lets try this again..

I have two friends, both have an apartment leased under they're names, who are staying with me for the next couple days.

Friend One needs a place to chill while he kicks a bad habit while Friend Two is waiting for his apartment to be finished and readied for him to move into.

Now damn it..I'm rambling.

Time to go.

Peace Out!!

dB

Easy and Chill

Not a lot to report this Monday morning. My weekend was easy and chill despite it being one of the busiest times of the year to be a Fog City resident.

Currently, I'm sitting here with a cup of coffee and watching the Today Show with a new friend. It's nice meeting someone new and interesting every once and a while. His name is Justin and he has the biggest and bluest eyes I think I've ever seen!

Soon I'll be mopping floors and cleaning up around my building..Pretending to be a Building Supervisor/Land Lord, I guess?!

Not much more to report so now I'm off to make breakfast for me and my new friend. Yummy!!

Hoping your day is Easy and Chill!

Peace Out!!!!

dB

Wal-Mart shuns gay groups

By Marc Gunther, Fortune senior writer
June 22 2007: 11:52 AM EDT

NEW YORK (FORTUNE) -- Wal-Mart, the world's largest retailer, has decided to curb its support of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender (GLBT) organizations after conservative Christian groups threatened a boycott, and after some of its own employees expressed disapproval.

The move comes a year after Wal-Mart (Charts, Fortune 500) had put on a gay-friendly smile. The company joined the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce. It sponsored the annual convention of Out & Equal, a group that promotes gay rights in the workplace, and sold gay-themed jewelry in stores.

"We are not currently planning corporate-level contributions to GLBT groups," said Mona Williams, the company's senior vice president of corporate communications. Individual stores can still donate to gay groups.

By way of explanation, Ms. Williams cited a policy adopted last fall saying that Wal-Mart would not make corporate contributions "to support or oppose highly controversial issues" unless they directly relate to the company's ability to serve its customers.

How significant is the pullback? Williams says it does not signal any less support for its GLBT employees or for Wal-Mart Pride, a network of gay employees at the company. She's an executive sponsor of the group, which was sanctioned in 2005. "We certainly don't feel that it's a retrenchment," she said.
Wal-Mart slows U.S. expansion

Others can't help but see it that way. After Wal-Mart explained its decision to a meeting of about 50 Pride members, one contacted FORTUNE to express disappointment.

"I thought the company was moving in the right direction," this employee wrote in an email. "But last week changed everything. Pulling funding from GLBT organizations is a slap in the face to gay employees and it sends a very clear message. Diversity within Wal-Mart is only partially inclusive." "They're catering to their conservative base," the employee added, in a phone conversation.

Interestingly, gay-rights groups were more understanding. Selisse Berry, the executive director of Out & Equal, said: "Wal-Mart continues to engage on the issue of worker equality, and we will support them in that...This is a marathon, not a sprint, and so long as Wal-Mart keeps its doors open, we hope to give them encouragement." Wal-Mart had donated $60,000 to Out & Equal.

The Human Rights Campaign, America's largest gay-rights group, also says it will continue to work closely with Wal-Mart. "With a company as large as Wal-Mart, it's not going to happen as fast as many of us would like," says Daryl Herrschaft, who oversees the HRC's workplace project.

Wal-Mart supported the gay chamber, an organization of more than 24,000 gay- and lesbian-owned businesses, for the first time last year. (Other corporate backers include IBM, Wells Fargo, Motorola and American Express.) The chamber's president, Justin Nelson, did not return a call seeking comment.

Several sources told FORTUNE that Wal-Mart now intends to work harder to educate its own employees about GLBT issues - something it had been advised to do before aligning itself publicly with gay-rights groups.

Last year, when anti-gay groups picketed stores, store managers weren't prepared to explain the company's position. Leaders of Wal-Mart Pride say most of its members work in and around the company's Bentonville headquarters, so they have been unable to muster allies in the field.

On June 9, Wal-Mart Pride members made a presentation to more than 500 employees at one of the company's Saturday morning meetings, which are used to rally the company around business goals. "The presentation was warmly received," Williams said.

Still, some members of the group had hoped that Wal-Mart would by now have taken a major step towards workplace equality by offering health care benefits to the domestic partners of its GLBT employees. More than half of FORTUNE 500 companies do so.

The lesson here may be that it's hard to find a middle ground when it comes to gay rights in the workplace. A company either believes in workplace equality for all, and is willing to stand up and say so, or it doesn't.

It's pretty clear where Wal-Mart stands

Choices, Choices, Choices

It's a little overwhelming all the choices for fun one has for this weekend. I'm not sure what everyone else will be doing but here are some of the tasty looking events where you mIght see me!


15th Anniversary San Francisco Dyke March
Parades
Part of Gay Pride
Live music, dance, spoken word, and emcees Ani and Zulma. (more...)
6/23/2007 Dolores Park
San Francisco
(Mission/Bernal Heights)


Living With Pride: The Work of Eric Rofes
Exhibits: History
Part of Gay Pride
“Living With Pride: The Work of Eric Rofe.” Papers, research files and books donated to the James C. Hormel Gay and Lesbian Center honoring the activist’s lifework. -- Chronicle
Through 8/9/2007 San Francisco Main Library
San Francisco
(Civic Center/Hayes Valley)

Mad to Live: Queers Under the Influence of the Beats
Lectures
Part of Gay Pride
Nonfiction Beat historian compares how contemporary queer poets, writers and performers have been influenced by the Beat literary legacy. -- Chronicle
6/27/2007 San Francisco Main Library
San Francisco
(Civic Center/Hayes Valley)

Mondays Salsa, Swing & Tease
Recreational Events
Gay-friendly salsa and swing dance lessons. No partner or experience necessary. Burlesquatters and SF Boylesque perform on the hour. -- Chronicle
Ongoing Julie's Supper Club
San Francisco
(SOMA/Potrero Hill)

San Francisco LGBT Pride Celebration
Fairs & Festivals
Part of Gay Pride
Come out, come out wherever you are, to the 37th annual San Francisco LGBT Pride Celebration and Parade. This year's extravaganza is as big and fabulous (more...)
6/23/2007 - 6/24/2007 Civic Center/Alioto Performing Arts Piazza
San Francisco
(Civic Center/Hayes Valley)

Pride

On the cusp of the Gay Holiday knows here as Pride Weekend I find myself looking forward to this weekends festivities.

This is always a most interesting time of year here in Fog City.

Not only does it seem as if everyone comes out during the Parade but there are massive parties and events that happen through out the weekend.

We have many visitors and a ton of Celebrates visit as well as Local, State and Federal Politicians that also get in on the acts by showing up to events and the parade which happens on Sunday.

There are many times during the year that SF is a very, very fun City to live in and this is most definitly one of those times!!

Personally, I'm looking forward to this weekend and I'm wishing everyone a Happy Pride!

Late Night/Early Morning

I'm half awake because this isn't the time I should be awake yet. My brain doesn't function very well at present but here I am. Typing. Sigh.

I rather I was pounding on some..Opps..Which blog am I writing on? LoL.

The newscasters on TV are especially loud this morning.

Somehow my brain is waking up. Or maybe not.

I've a chest cold.

It's time for bed again.

Later.